I have no I idea wanted me to lecture on How To Find a Mate Who will make you Miserable to a bunch of college age women but, I don't care why the wanted me to lecture. The gig payed well and that is all i wanted to know.
The night before the lecture I prepared my lecture. I am always very through, Yep. I needed to get myself in the right frame of mind for the morning so I decided to spend 5 hours on my computer surfing the internet which always makes me miserable and guarantees that my night of sleep will be restless and I will have a bad day in the morning. And as I expected I awoke tired an miserable; I barely got any sleep.
I arrived at the lecture hall at 7:30 for a 8:30 because I like to get to lectures last so I arrived early. The lecture hall was packet of my miserable lecture. I don't like to speak to large crowds so this was perfect. I was miserable.
Hello Ladies my name is Yvette swans and I am here to lecture you on how to find a significant other who will make you miserable for the rest of you life. I am an expert in finding a miserable mate. After all I have been married to Tank Swans a man who makes me absolutely miserable. The first quality I think is important in finding that wrong someone is that when you first lay eyes on them that person makes you miserable. Most people look for someone who make them happy well I say they are wrong. You also need to look for someone who criticizes everything you do. Again most people look for people who accept them and try to help make them better. You also need to look for someone who constantly argues with you about everything. Someone who you don't agree with on any subject.
Now I will give you my personal story. When I met my husband Tank I saw him and thought wow, I have never been so miserable around another person in my life. So when he asked me out I said not but, he persisted. At that time I was into happiness and had not discovered the joys of being miserable. Eventually he pestered me so much I just gave into his requests for a date and as expected the date was horrible, he took me to a cheap restaurant with bad food and got into an argument with the waiter. I never wanted to see tank again. But, since I was getting older and did not have may suitors. Any suitors I liked. But, I did have strong feeling about tank. Sure they were negative feeling but, they were feeling nonetheless and I figured when he proposed its either marry him or live alone and I would have hated to live alone. I also hatted seeing Tank but, I wanted to get married so on September 21, 1985 we were married in a ceremony bu the justice of the peace. I was in a traditional wedding dress but, Tank the wonderful man that his is arrived in his P.J.'s and a cowboy hat. He was also drunk. This all made me very angry not the ideal way to start a marriage I know but, by this time I had decided to be miserable for the rest of my life. It was the best decision of my life to become miserable. I would not be miserable because I wanted to be happy and I was not I was miserable by choice and that is a great thing. It sound weird to hear that but, so what.
We went to a restaurant for are Honeymoon. Yes, you heard that right a restaurant. Tank Swans is the cheapest man I know which makes me dislike him a lot. The restaurant was a one star restaurant was a one star restaurant. The food was horrible. Yes, my married life was off to a rocky start and it would only get worse from then on. But, I knew we would be together until the day we died which hopefully for me would not be long until I died. But, that was 20 years ago and I am still alive. After the honeymoon since Tank has never had a job we moved into his parents house. Wow, that was a miserable place to live let me tell you, and now I will tell you in minute detail.
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