Queen of Miserable novel, Page 15

After my little argument with Tank I was to exhausted to shop so I went to the food court to get something to eat. When I get even more upset than I usually am I get ravenously hungry.

So I picked the eatery with an all you can eat buffet. Johansen's all you can eat buffet was an aptly named place to eat. There was only one menu item and that was and all you can eat buffet. For 15 dollars the customers could eat all they wanted. There was a big island in the center of the restaurant where employees would bring out warm food every few minutest to restock the food island.

I of course ordered the all you can eat buffet which included all you can drink also. I had spaghetti with meatball and garlic bread. Next I had a plate of angle food cake. Then I went back for more garlic bread and spaghetti. And for another dessert I tried brownies and vanilla ice cream. Suitably fed I decided that what I wanted to do next was go to a movie.

Watching scary monster moves makes me miserable so I decided to go watch Scary Monster from the deep. Which interesting enough was about scary monsters from the deep. A man goes out fishing and sees a huge monster with 8 limbs and a tiny head with big jaws. After jamming on the accelerator of his boat he tells the other fishermen what he saw and they just laugh at him and dismiss what he was saying as someone what has to vivid and imagination.

Bud during the night the monster came back with several of his friends and ravaged the fisherman. There fisherman's cries for help were head but the were heard to late to do them any good. A group of islanders game down with harpoons and guns to help the fisher but, found them dead. To make a long story short the islander vow revenge and after several fierce battles the monsters come out on top and life on the island peacefully for the next 20 years until the are confronted by different monsters and forced to live in the sea again.

What a great move. I walked out of the theatre as scared as could be. I decided that I better keep on shopping. I know I could not have made it out to my car. I would have fear that a monster might attack me. So a shopping I go. I could not help but, admire all the wonderful plants in the mall. I noticed a gardener and decided to talk to her.

Excuse me can I ask you a few questions please. "Sure what can I do for you Mr. Swans. "Oh you know who I am." "Why yes of course I have read several of your books. "Ok, how long have you been working here.? I said. "5 years." She said. "Do you like your job." I said. "No" She said. "Why don't you like you job I asked. "Oh, I don't like plants". "Then why don't you find another job that you like." I said. " "I believe in you philosophy that you should take a job for the money and the miserableness will follow." "Very good" I said. "Well thank you for your time." I said. "Can I have your autograph". She said. "Which one, you can have my down home country autograph or my movie star autograph. "I'll take the movie star autograph please." she said. "What do you want me to sign." "Here could you sign your book, I have it right her." "okay. her you go and I signed my name." She was over joyed and was all smiles. She waved good bye as I dragged my purchases in my little red wagon. Wow, I am miserable talking to fans. I need to talk to them more often. Now where was I going to shop.